Life Lessons from the Dance Floor

inspirational musings from a dancing scientist

  • Out of My League

    Out of My League

    The phrase “out of my league,” with a sports origin, refers to a skill too advanced for one’s current level. This weekend I volunteered as a substitute in a local bowling league, to try something new and because the 2023 documentary Join or Die (based on the 2000 book, Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community) made an impression. I was literally out of my league as a beginner among advanced longtime bowlers. They were welcoming, despite my low score, but I struggled to connect (e.g., asking why we need to switch lanes)–so, unfortunately, I felt as if I were “bowling alone.” That uncomfortable, newcomer feeling is something I’ve experienced many times in my life.

    In college, I boldly and naively tried out for activities out of my (Ivy) league, including: the theater club, where I learned my drama background didn’t qualify me for university-level plays; the tennis team, where I embarrassed myself playing against classmates who had been competing since they could hold a racket; crew team, for the coxswain position, despite having no rowing experience; and dance team, where I must have thought my high school roles in Pippin and West Side Story qualified me to compete against Princeton dance majors. I did not make any of those teams, which was humbling.

    For those college dance team tryouts, the captain placed me in the front row of the group of talented women auditioning. I was expected to instantly pick up the jazz choreography sequences in real time, with everyone behind me watching. The first count of 8 was OK. The second and third counts were less OK, and the first section had escaped my brain when she called out, “From the top!” And so on, and so on, until I felt like Lucille Ball in a hilarious I Love Lucy episode (see “Lucy Takes Ballet Lessons”).

    Now, as the only new student in my current adult group “advanced beginner” tap class — with a nationally-renowned teacher and several dozen women who have studied under her for years — I once again feel out of my league, just like Lucy in that dance scene. Only four weeks into the season, the choreography is so complex I need to study the video from class and practice at home, to keep up and avoid the teacher singling me out. And yet, I love the joy of movement, the camaraderie, the sound of tapping in unison, the satisfaction of tackling an intense mental and physical challenge.

    Below is a favorite postcard I’ve had on my desk for decades. I’m proud of my younger and current self, willing to feel like a misfit (like the girl in the photo) for the sake of growth. I just saw this Kurt Vonnegut quote: “To practice any art, no matter how well or how badly, is a way to make your soul grow…”.

    What art have you practiced that felt out of your league at first?

  • A Valentine to Dancing

    A Valentine to Dancing

    Well, I survived another Valentine’s Day – a holiday charged with societal expectations that are hard to live up to even if one is in a romantic relationship. It is also celebrated by (single) women as “Galentine’s Day.” This holiday I’m focusing on love and gratitude for my galentines who inspire me and have supported me through many ups and downs, and for my children — the loves of my life. I’m grateful for my health, meaningful work, cozy home, and the effervescent joy that dancing brings me.

    After meeting one of my galentines at a cafe after work, I went to my 8pm adult tap class. My teacher had offered to cancel it, to be sensitive to women who may be celebrating with their romantic life partner, but the students declined the offer. All of us — both married and single — emphasized how much we need tap dance in our lives.

    My two adult group tap classes this week (practiced the Shim Sham in one and a routine to NKOTB in the other) and my private ballroom lesson (focused on waltz and foxtrot) brought their signature endorphins to my brain and giddy smile to my face. I can always count on dance to make me feel fantastic, no matter what else is going on in my work or personal life. And for these reasons, this is my VALENTINE TO DANCING.

  • Humbled

    Humbled

    This week and last I took two adult tap classes and private ballroom lesson. I loved them all for different reasons, and my teachers are all great for different reasons. One tap class focuses on performance choreography, and the other on classical training and tap history. Tapping in sync with a group of women at different stages in life feels nourishing and empowering. In the Wednesday night class we watched a classic clip with Gregory Hines paying homage to Sammy Davis Jr., then attempted to do our own paradiddles routine. That was humbling after watching the greats and then our professional teacher do a complex fast sequence with several top teen dancers in the studio. I was proud of myself for being able to keep up for most of the slow version of the paradiddle routine (single, single, double, double, single – repeat; single, single, triple, triple, single). It takes tremendous focus and mindfulness. There is no time for negative self talk if I miss a step, because then I’m lost and don’t want to throw off the others as we create a beautiful syncopated group sound.

    I was also humbled in my ballroom lesson this week (and every lesson I’ve ever had because the artform is so technically complex). My teacher Fitz took me back to ballroom walking basics (brush heel on 1, toe step on 2, 3, heel down on the &…). Learning to walk again is just what I needed to improve my base and foundational skills. There’s no faking footwork when one “ballroom walks” across the studio alone, just like there’s no faking tap footwork (it is clearly audible when one missteps). 

    Another epiphany I had is updating my previous observation that dance is about physics and feelings to: dance is about physics, feelings, and personality (and connection in any type of partner dancing). We are practicing smooth ballroom style (this week was waltz and foxtrot, last week waltz and tango), which involves letting go of close hold for each partner to express themselves (e.g., with a dramatic arm movement). As a dancing scientist, I am continually challenged to balance physics with feelings and personality!

  • Joys of Tap Dancing

    Joys of Tap Dancing

    When I was around five years old I started watching Shirley Temple movies on our old television, enthralled with the tap dancing routines of this talented charismatic girl around my age, lighting up the screen. I memorized her moves and tried to reenact scenes in my basement to escape family dramas upstairs. It would be decades later when I bought my own tap shoes, first to tap around the house with my daughter and then to rediscover the joy of it after I paused ballroom dancing.

    In my first adult beginner group tap class, I was delighted to learn a “Singin’ in the Rain” routine, but alas that was cut short by the pandemic. Last year I took a private class and was thrilled warming up to the Beatles and Taylor Swift then learn “Another Day of Sun” from La-La Land. No matter what type of bad day I had at work, it was 100% guaranteed I would leave the dance studio spouting endorphins and smiling like Gene Kelly.

    In my most recent tap class series I was feeling overconfident the first lesson because I had more dance experience than the other women, who were newcomers—until our wise and experienced teacher asked us to do 2 counts of 8 with improv to express our soul. She asked me to go first, and I panicked trying to remember steps from the La-La-Land number. The steps I did remember did not go well with the music. I danced like a stressed engineer following a logic diagram, who is good with a recipe or prepared speech but not comfortable going off script. The other women with less dance experience tapped with simpler steps than mine but radiated joy and expressed their souls in how they moved their bodies to the 1929 version of “Just a Gigolo.” I felt humbled, and ready to challenge myself again next week. If I learn to improvise tap with heart and soul, I will reward myself with purple patent leather tap shoes like the ones my teacher rocks.